"If you keep on saying things are going to be bad, you have a good chance of being a profit." - Isaac Bashevis Singer
Life is in many regards a self-fulfilling prophecy. You generally get out of it what you expect. If you expect to have a great time at a party, then you will most likely have a great time. If you expect your business to fail, then it most likely will. If you expect your marriage to continually improve, then it has an excellent chance of doing so.
Perhaps you were told at a young age never to set your hopes too high because if they didn't come true, you would be disappointed. The unfortunate thing about this kind of thinking is that it keeps people from reaching their full potential. Like Malcolm Forbes said, "If you expect nothing, you're apt to be surprised. You'll get it." We'll tell you a little secret - if you expect to lose and you end up losing, you will still be disappointed. So if you run the risk of being disappointed either way, why not expect the best and increase your chances of getting it.
Go ahead, get your hopes up, expect great things to happen, believe that you are a winner. And when your mind starts to drift toward negative possibilities, stop yourself and immediately replace those thoughts with positive victorious ones. You have to train your mind on how to think.
"It is the nature of man to rise to greatness if greatness is expected of him." - John Steinbeck
What we expect of ourselves and of the events that take place in our lives is critically important and so are the expectations that we have of others. This is especially true of the marriage relationship. When you expect great things from your spouse great things usually happen. Notice that we said "expect" not "nag."
When you expect great things from another, you are more likely to encourage and support them. Compliments and praise are your attitudes of choice instead of insults and criticism. Comments like, "you'll do a fantastic job," "I believe in you," "you are very talented," "they will love your presentation," are sprinkled into your conversation. After a while, they will live up to your expectations.
"Children are likely to live up to what you believe of them." - Lady Bird Johnson
If you have children, you probably know the importance of having high expectations of them. Again, not in a nagging kind of way, but rather an encouraging one. And one of the best ways that we know of to do this is to compliment them in front of others or let them overhear you say wonderful things about them to others.
Your expectations hold the key to your future. Expect things to be the way you would like them to be and sooner or later your life will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
********** Darren and Donna McNees are Authors of "The 21 Day Marriage Makeover: How to transform your marriage into one filled with more love, affection, fun and happiness." To experience your Marriage Makeover or to get your free bi-weeky newsletter containing proven yet simple advice designed to enrich your life and energize your marriage go to www.21DayMarriageMakeover.com. *********** Copyright © 2004 Darren & Donna McNees. Reprint permission is granted if the article is used in its entirety including all of the contact information above.
